imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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