Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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