Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
