If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
