I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize