How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
