Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize