I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
