It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Oh god it's open bar.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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