no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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