So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize