Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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