he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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