jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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