Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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