I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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