i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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