i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
