NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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