I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
