Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
