I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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