OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
