the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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