if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
