you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Randomize
