ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
