Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
He kissed a someone with a penis
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
