how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Randomize
