Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
