It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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