whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
