In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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