I think i sorta joined a cult last night
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
