And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I need moral support for this bender
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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