I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
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