Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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