i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
