i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
