He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
