i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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