I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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