That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
