We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
