brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
You're my little dorito
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Randomize
