people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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