The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
