this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
