it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
