Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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